A Day in the Life of this Slogger

Monday, March 13th, 2017

10.28am – I’m dying for a day of faffing around, doing nothing. I really want to go to Cornwall, too. Perhaps St. Ives. Pretty much anywhere mentioned in a Dorothy Sayers novel would also do it for me. However, being a volunteer with two paid jobs and two grannies at opposite ends of the county to visit makes me rather busy.
On the plus side, I’m busy.

10.33am – There is this infestation of bluebottles in all the Velux windows in the roof, and they give me the creeps. I hate their evil fly wings and the way they rub their front legs together, like they’re plotting to ruin my quiet time.

10.46am – I vacuumed all the little horrors away. Now, I’m watching the hose for signs of movement, for fear they’d make a re-appearance.

10.47am – Twinings Assam tea is a thing of excellence. Anything malty does it for me – Malteasers, malt vinegar, and now Assam tea! What a world I live in!

10.52am – I have a pimple on my tummy.
PLS LAWD why am I not like those Instagram girls in their bikinis??

11.08am – On that note, I decided to go for a run. There’s something so thrilling about putting on new exercise gear, and getting ready to face the world.

11.12am – Well, I may feel streamlined and very in place, but I can confirm that I’m bulging everywhere, spilling over my pants, and that the back fat is real. How and ever, that’s what the running is to eliminate – so off I’ll pop.

11.24am – I’m not sure that knitting is the most practical warm-up to do. That said, I need to make sure the water I just guzzled stays down, so knit I shall.

12.36pm – I went for a run, and saw two tractors. Ah, country life!

12.59pm – Got to shower, I have meetings in an hour!
Hey, a rhyme. I’m a modern poet, what can I say?

6.04pm – I have had very productive meetings, visited Nena, and now, I’m going to make dinner. This is the life.

6.52pm – There’s a giant cup of Assam tea in front of me, and there’s knitting to be done. That’s me for the evening!

6.53pm – What on earth is malt, even?




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